3 Fears Driving Your “Enough Is Not Enough” Mentality
Sometimes discussions in a social gathering take a boring turn to the topic that rules our adult lives. You know… the subject that concerns you happiness or lack of it… the topic of making money.
So many people feel that slogging their lives away at the office is a burden that they can never relief themselves of. Some even proclaim that they do so because they have decided to be rich.
That is hardly surprising when we are so vulnerable to indulging in fancy merchandise that we don’t need. So pampered are we these days, that many of the “wants” in life are categorized irrevocably as “needs”.
But if you look at this topic with the innocent mind you used to have when you were 7, you’d probably agree that all you need to survive on is actually very little.
So little that an individual on minimum wage can get by easily as long as he does not give in to his retail therapy.
To those who consider themselves affluent, I get it.
- It is necessary for you to moisturize your skin with branded skincare that cost $100 an ounce.
- It is absolutely necessary for you to have dinner in cozy restaurants or you will lose your appetite.
- No handbags have the strength in it fabric to hold your personal items unless a designer label is impressed on it’s surface.
But if we don’t talk about living a life of luxury or one on minimum wage, the average person on average wage can already live a more than fulfilling life in terms of buying power… unless he gets scammed out of his money in one of those scam investment schemes.
So what is the cause of your “Enough is not Enough” mentality that is driving you to voluntarily overwork yourself… so much that you don’t even have the time to spend what you earn?
It usually comes down to 3 fears that are deeply embedded in your brain.
You would be lying to yourself if you declare yourself as having no insecurities. Everyone has something to be insecure about.
And when you have the burden of the family income on your shoulders, it is totally fine to admit that you are insecure about the consistency of your income should you start living more life and work less.
You can let your masculinity take a back seat for a moment and acknowledge your insecurities.
Nobody is judging you. And acceptance is the first step towards management.
At it’s most basic, this fear is the source of your motivation to work long hours and strike-off your vacations so that you can… work more.
Isn’t it odd that fear can be one of the most powerful motivators in life…
Because there is a fear that your money will eventually run out if you don’t continue to beef up your savings accounts, you just cannot bring yourself to take a foot off the pedal, even for a while.
This effectively appoints you as a slave to money.
2) Social perception
Human beings are social beings. We cannot help but want to the approval of the people around us. Even is you feel that you are not approval-seeking, you cannot deny that given a choice, you’d prefer to be accepted than rejected.
Our society is build on the merits of working for a living… and saving as much as you can.
Unless you are interacting in an investors network, your peers would probably be more accommodating with your views on money if you champion more savings than investing.
This implies that if you were to go against the grain and spend more of your time enjoying life rather than working, few people in your social circle will be able to support your cause. And therefore potentially making you an outcast in the circle when topics like these arise.
It would be a different matter if you are successful businessman who earns passive income from the business systems you’ve set up. People perceive that differently. Very much different than if you were substituting your work time for free time.
In this sense, there is indeed a social element in your “Enough is not Enough” outlook when it comes to financial matters.
Saving money is something that financial advisors advocate. They would be perceived as crazy if they don’t.
The biggest barrier that is stopping us from doing things we want to do is the fear of change.
When we get so accustomed to a routine, any form of actions that might bring a change to our routines will have to be scrutinized. This is even when the action will produce a better result… or the lack of it will result in demise.
From an individual perspective, the refusal to live a “less work, more life” kind of lifestyle can very often be due to a resistance to change.
Suddenly, you might have to:
- accept a lower take-home income
- take on the hassle of planning for holidays
- shoulder the burden of constantly justifying your decision to your spouse
- and more
These “extra” work might really look daunting when the alternative is to continue spending your “extra” time sitting in the office (like you always do) and wait for the time to pass. You retain your current income as well.
Having more time suddenly seems more burdensome. Suddenly people start taking advantage of you for the free time you have. Suddenly negative money mindsets look like a walk in the park.
“Enough is not Enough” merely becomes an excuse not to induce a change in routine.
Most people who insist that they don’t have enough don’t have a specific number in mind of how much IS actually enough. And even if they have an estimate figure, they have little to no idea what they are going to do with that sum of money.
Many DO have a number in mind… but their numbers are plucked out of the air.
You will never be able to work out an exact figure of what you need. And you might even already have the REAL amount you need sitting in your bank account from years of savings!